Waiting for inspiration

Has it seriously been 5 months since my last post?! I may have been waiting for inspiration. I may have been a little busy .....just having a baby. December 1st, 2011 at 7:21 am we welcomed Naomi Grace into our family. She was 6lbs 13oz 19.5 inches long. She has long fingers, great for piano playing, lungs of a tuba player and beautiful red hair. She has been such a blessing!

This is Naomi, March 5th at Valentine's 5th birthday party.

Our house is under contract but since it's a short sale it's taking a long time. We are praying that it finalizes soon. We would love to be in our own house by the time school starts next year. All things are possible when you trust in the Lord.

Don't get me wrong the past year spent in my parents house has been such a blessing. I am so thankful that they have let us stay with them for the past year. I had so many complications at the end of my pregnancy that if I didn't have the family's help I don't even know what we would have done. But we still long to have our own home again. I can barely remember what its like to have my own kitchen and house to take care of. I'm pretty sure Titus doesn't remember our house in VA. Pray with us that we can be blessed with our own home again soon, very soon.

I've been reading a book our pastor wrote called "The Prayers of Jehoshaphat: Seeing beyond life's storms" (By Stanley Gale). It has really helped me look past life's bumps and storms and see God's grace and love through it and above all learn to put my trust in Him.

Oh another note, I've signed up for my first race. I'll be running the Sandy Sprint 5k in Philadelphia on April 28th. I'm really excited for it but nervous too. I don't want to let anyone down, especially myself. Since I started training I found that I have "runners knee". Apparently when I run I swing my one leg out. It's a strength thing. I need to strengthen my hip flexors. I'm working on it. I plan to run outside for the first time today. I've been running on my parents treadmill and it has been wonderful! I put the kids in front of the tv or down for rest time, put the baby in her swing and I can run. But it's getting boring. I hope running outside will reignite my fire for running.

Our pc had some virus issues (trojans or something). No matter how many programs we ran to clean it as soon as we restarted they came back. So we got a mac. I love it! We were able to fix the pc so now Jake has a laptop he can play his games on. It is fantastic. The kids and I have really enjoyed all the fun things to do on the mac like photobooth. We all get a kick out of the funny faces we can make with the program.

Well, I better get back to my children. It's time for Naomi to eat. I have the best job in the world!

Watch it- Pass it on!

Lessons through pain

We've been faced with many struggles (and blessings through the struggles) in the recent months.

• First Jake loses his job.
• He couldn't secure a new one in Virginia so we had to uproot our family and move back to Pennsylvania.
• We moved back to Pennsylvania and are living with my parents as we wait for our house to sell.
• The new job Jake got in Pennsylvania pays a lot less so he had to get a second job. Meaning less time with his family.
• Since we had to move out of state for this new job we had to sell our house. The market in Richmond is very depressed so we had to put our house up for short sale. Meaning we make absolutely no money in the sale of our house, we have a two year ding on our credit and have to struggle for the coming years trying to catch up with what this decision has cost us.
• The sale of our house falls through 2 days before closing (And four months working with this buyer. Jumping through his hoops). We were finally feeling like our battle was coming to an end. But now we have to start all over again.
• I am homeschooling our children and expecting our fourth. These are blessings but are also struggles. It's hard to concentrate on a lesson when my other kids are being noisy and disruptive. It will be incredibly hard to homeschool the kids when I have a toddler and a newborn.
• A friend of mine who I've been praying and fasting for (for nearly a year now) seems to be losing her battle with cancer.
• My beloved aunt passed away Tuesday, August 30th, after battling cancer for a mere 2 months.

But through all this I was reminded at my aunts service this past Saturday that I should be Praising God! I should be saying How can I glorify God in this trial? How can His name be praised?

My aunt and my friend Rachel would say this as they struggle and are in excruciating pain. Don't cry for me! How can I pray for you? How can I glorify God in this? I want to be that woman. I want to cry out to God while my heart is breaking. I want to glorify His precious name!

Would you pray for me, for us, as we do our best to Praise His Holy Name? There is a Light, it is Jesus. I know we will get through these struggles and this pain. But right now I'm having a hard time. I could really use encouragement and prayer.

Blessed be the Name of the Lord!

An update from my uncle.

This is Jim, writing from my sister Kathy's Facebook page. I am overwhelmed with gratitude as I sit here and read the notes from all the people who are praying for my dear wife. I have never experienced this kind of pain before, though 50 years ago this past April, as an 11 year old boy, I watched my father die with this same disease. That was hard...this is devastating. I have tried not to question God in all of this; I recognize His sovereignty and accept His will for Anna's life. But I must admit that I don't even come close to understanding. I thought perhaps He was waiting for me to lift the ban on visitors so that my immediate family and Anna's siblings could come and see her. I did that yesterday, much to the chagrin of my precious wife. I could tell she was agitated by all the commotion and sensed a bit of displeasure with me for having violated her wishes. All four of her sisters got to see her and say goodbye. My son and daughter and their children got to say goodbye. My three sisters have seen her and two are with me even now, lest I be alone when the time comes for Him to welcome her home. This morning, reading from the Daily "Crouton", as Pastor Marks so affectionately called The Daily Bread, I read about a Matter of Perspective. The last paragraph says, "When we simply cannot understand why God allows circumstances that threaten to overwhelm us, it is good to remember that He has our good and His glory in mind. If we can say, "Father, please enable me to trust and honor You in this situation," then we will be in concert with His perspective and plan." Anna's concern in all of this, from the beginning until the point where she could no longer communicate clearly, was "How am I glorifying God in all of this?" I can tell you that all of the perceptions you folks have of my Anna are accurate. She is the epitome of the Proverbs 31 woman. A prayer warrior, a giving, caring woman who dedicated her life to helping people through times like she is presently going. When God commanded us to "Be holy, for I am holy.", to the best of her ability she heeded His command. I know no one who is as concerned about being holy as much as she is. Even now, in her distress, she wonders how she can glorify the Father in heaven. I have no idea what He has in mind for me. Anna has been part of my life since July of 1964, weeks before my 15th birthday. When she finally graduates to heaven I will be relieved for the end to her suffering, but my nightmare without her will continue on from the nightmare that I'm enduring right now, watching her suffer. And still, I trust Him...He who sent His only Son to die for me. For those of you reading this who have not trusted your life to Christ, I beg you to do that right now. I couldn't care less what church affiliation you have. Religion is man reaching up to God...Christianity is God reaching down to man. I teach my AWANA children how simple it is to be saved...as simple as A,B,C. First, you have to admit you're a sinner. If you're not a sinner, you don't need a Savior. But God's word tells us that you are a sinner. (Romans 3:23) Then, you must believe that Jesus is who He said he was...the Son of God. But that's not the end. Many think the C is confess. But that's taken care of when you believe. The C is Choose. My Sparkies love this story. Let's pretend I have the ability to shut you in a room that is totally devoid of light. On the other side of the room is a door that you can get out. But there are numerous traps that will take your life if you try to get out in the dark. Before I leave you, I place a flashlight in front of you. You choose to get out of the room on your own, rejecting the gift that I gave you. You die. Don't blame me! I gave you everything you needed to get out, but you rejected it. God gave you everything you need to enter Heaven. Accept His free gift of eternal life right now. To not accept Christ is to reject Him. The best way to honor Anna in all that she's going through is to ask Christ to save you. I love all of you. Please continue to pray for God's mercy in Anna's struggle right now. God bless you all.

Deep Breath

I am thankful that we haven't had many scares as parents.

We had the first real one while I was pregnant with Titus. Lucinda and Valentine we climbing up Lucinda's dresser to get something off the top and the dresser fell over on them. Lucinda was able to pull her foot out and just had a scratch but Valentine was trapped under the dresser. The cd player (90s version, nice and big and very heavy) was being held by the plug in the wall. If it had come out of the wall it would have smashed his face. I ran into the room as soon as I heard the crash but I couldn't pull Valentine out and keep the drawers from falling out onto him. I screamed for Jake. He came in and moved the dresser. I pulled Valentine out and he didn't have a scratch on him. God was good.

The second one was when Titus was just 6 months old. We were driving home from a visit in Pennsylvania and stopped at a Wendy's for a bathroom break and some french fries. Jake took the older 2 into the bathroom while I waited in the lobby for them with Titus. It was about 8pm. Two men came in with ski masks on and guns swinging and robbed the restaurant. That was a very scary very traumatic experience for me. For all of us. I haven't been to a Wendy's since that day. And will never go to a Wendy's again.

Well, yesterday has been added to our list of scary experiences as parents. We've had kids come down with croup before but it never got this bad. Titus started showing signs of croup Saturday when he woke up from his nap. I did what I had done in the past with the other kids. Took him in the bathroom and let the water run hot to help open his airways. It didn't help. Not even a little. But he didn't seem any worse so we went through the day and as long as he was moving he was okay. Then during the night he was up every hour coughing and struggling to breathe. He slept in bed with us for some of the night and when I was watching him sleep I could see how hard it was for him to breathe. He was gasping for air. Every breath was very shallow. And he had a fever. So we decided it was time to take him to the ER. After two epinephrine breathing treatments, a shot of steroids and constant oxygen he wasn't improving. The hospital we went to didn't have a pediatric unit so they decided to transfer him to a near by hospital with a wonderful peds unit. He stayed there for 3 hours and was discharged after showing some improvement. He came home with a prescription for steroids for the next 3 days and he's acting more like himself today. Still not 100% but much better than he was. He still has a pretty bad cough but at least he can breathe now! Great it His faithfulness! We are so thankful that we decided to take him in and not wait any longer. We are so thankful that God took care of Titus and opened his airways.

Now we can all take a deep breath. Praise God!

Vacation

So tomorrow morning we will be packing into the SUV and head off to Tennessee. That may sound really exciting for some of you but for me it sounds like doom. Ten hours of driving with three little kids, with out my husband!! We plan to split up the driving to two days. But the way back will be all in one shot. I hope we can survive it.

It doesn't sound much like vacation. Jake will be back to Pennsylvania in two days. We leave tomorrow. So we will miss each other by one day! Then we will be in TN for nine days. I think this will be the longest that we've ever been apart. And I have never driven this far with the kids and I have never driven any length without his help.

Please pray for us. I'm sure we will have a good time but we are all missing Jake. I really miss his help and support. It won't feel like a vacation without the head of our household.

Does absence really make the heart grow fonder?

This morning I said goodbye to my dear husband (with *many, many* tears). We won't see each other for two whole weeks! He is flying out to Oklahoma for more training and the kids and I will be headed to Tennessee on Thursday, we will be gone for nine days. We will miss each other by one stinking day.

So does absence really make the heart grow fonder? Do we really love our missing spouse more when they've been away for weeks? I'm not sure. When Jake is gone I can't sleep, I'm depressed and the kids are super grumpy. And I won't lie, it's nice when he gets home from work to have someone help me with the kids. He is usually the one who gets them to bed. By the end of the day I'm about to pass out already. Now I'm "on duty" from 6am to 7pm (except the baby-not a baby anymore, I need to stop calling him that...) takes over an hour to get to sleep! Tonight it took nearly two hours. And I know what you're thinking, that I should put the kids down later because they're probably not tired at 7pm. Oh no my friend, they. are. tired. No matter what time they go to bed, 7pm, 10pm, midnight, they still are up at 6am. With out fail. So I might as well put them to bed at 7 so I can have a few extra hours of rest for me. The older two kids don't take naps so they're underfoot all day. Titus only takes one nap a day and it's usually only for an hour some days I get a glorious two hours. But those days are rare.

I don't know how I'll survive 12 days without him. I miss him all day and now I'll be missing him at night too. I sound like a adolescent but we really do love each other this much. How many people do you know have been married to their high school sweetheart and still are head over heals in love with them almost 10 years later? Not many. I am so thankful for the love we have for each other.

God has blessed us abundantly. I can see how much He loves us through the little things in life. He blesses me with a husband who loves me with all my (countless!) flaws, He blesses us with beautiful children, He blesses us with family who is gracious enough to let us live with them while our house in VA sells and we look for a house here. There are more blessings I can't even list them all. I am SO blessed!

So now, Lord, put the rock under my feet so I don't drown. I need You to keep my head above water. You are my Solid Rock, all other grounds are sinking sand.

Please pray for me and the kids as we struggle through these next two weeks as a single parent household. Tennessee will be fun but I will be missing my man. And I know he will be missing us! He has as hard of a time being apart as I do.